Comic for Monday, May 4, 2009

Posted: 6:25 am, Monday, May 4th

What the hell? I have no idea where this one came from. I've never ever played Risk. It always seemed very complicated and imposing. Also, I was an only child in the woods, so most board games I played were between my teddy bear and He-Man or Skeletor. I would have He-Man and Skeletor play Monopoly Saturday morning between six thirty and eight (the Muppets were on at six, and then only crappy cartoons until eight o'clock). I'd stack the Chance deck to have the Advance to Boardwalk card on top, and the game wouldn't officially start until He-Man rolled a seven. I was a very lonely child. And I still don't know where today's strip came from.

I meant to mention this on Friday, but 2.0 picked me up a library book last week that I absolutely tore through. Local by Brian Wood and Ryan Kelly is a great black and white 12-issue series of thematically related one-shots. It's mostly about Megan McKeenan, a fuck-up drifter who keeps moving around the country. Each issue takes place in a different town that is really well-researched from what I can tell. The Slope gets an issue, and Music Matters makes an appearance, which is pretty cool. Anyway, the whole series is collected in one hardback edition, and if you like Five Bucks, you'll probably dig Local. Highly recommended.

Holy crap, the swine flu was all my kids could talk about last week. Can this just end?

The final book in the Percy Jackson series comes out tomorrow. That's pretty exciting.

I totally forgot to wish Licia a happy one on Friday. My bad, dude, hope it was a great day.

Sox flopped around against the Rays all weekend, losing four of five since their 11-game streak. Julio Lugo continues to be an absolute fucking butcher in the field, and Javier Lopez also sucks. The realization the other day that my two least favorite Sox both have the same initials made me take pause. Their initials are JL. Clearly you all knew that, because you're not stupid, but the initials JL have reared their ugly head in my experience in the past - this dude that was in a writing class with me and Grafe our senior year at ND . This kid wrote these really awful stories where all the male characters were constantly crying about something or other, and always signed his stories just "jl." He wasn't the worst writer in the class - well, actually, maybe he was. There was a meatheaded guy in the class, too, who basically wrote a Rashomon ripoff for one story, but I don't think he actually thought he was a good writer. jl did. Anyway, I hope none of you readers have the initials jl, because it's evidently a gateway to sucktitude.

Kind of a heart-breaking article in the Times about small Pontiac dealers now that they're shuttering the brand. Maybe I'm just sappy first thing in the morning, but it pretty much got to me.

bullfrog

Miyaa -- Monday, May 4 2009, 07:27 am

I'm pretty sure they made a computer version of the Risk game for the Mac. It's one of the few drawbacks for the Mac, there aren't a lot of games made for it.

The only reason I thought of Risk is because one of the teachers I work with plays it on his iPhone all the time.

If I take out Lugo you'll send me cookies in jail, right? 2 routine grounders right to him at short and he couldn't make either play, and of course the drop on the DP. Might as well just leave Green in.

Not sure how I feel about the road uniforms. I get the back-to-basics thing, but they're kinda boring. If I wanted to see a team in featureless boring uniforms I could just turn on a Yankee road game.

Zero

I'm not big on the road unis. 2.0 said it best - from behind, we look like the Goat Fuckers, but with names.

Lugo's terrible. God, I can't stand him.

Thanks! Was actually a pretty nice b-day! btw, I love risk! but there is no way that all the troops, horses, and cannons will stay on the board during the car ride. Ron's going to be finding little army dudes in his car for months to come.

I will avoid posting about the above comments about the Yankees' classic road unis, but I hope the storyline with Risk ends like this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzLtF_PxbYw

The little meta-text joke of the day if you mouseover the picture is actually, "The Ukraine is weak!", Coach.

Risk is not so bad. Just be sure to work in a reference to taking over Kamchatka and you'll sound like a veteran!

P.S. I read an entire month of your site yesterday. India was bad for keeping up on the Five Bucks adventures.

I was keeping up with your India adventures. I let my kids watch Slumdog Millionaire the day before spring break (all seven of them who showed up), and shared your monkey stories with them.

All-class move by the Goat Fuckers last night!

http://www.nydailynews.com/sports/baseball/yankees/2009/05/04/2009-05-04_yankees_fans_told_game_cancelled_not_let_back_into_stadium_.html

Zack Greinke is out of this world good right now. Great for a kid who really almost lost it all a few seasons ago. ("It all" being the baseball "it all," not, like, lost his house and got shot or something.)

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/baseball/mlb/gameflash/2009/05/04/26029_recap.html

While we were in Europe, my sister (who lives in Kansas City) received an e-mail from her husband (whose groom's cake featured the Royals logo, for the record), informing her that he wanted to name their first child "Greinke Zach Jackson."

In today's KC Star, Greinke says he needs to do this for three years to be considered one of the game's greats. I recommend your sister and her hubby wait on the name 'til then...

I can't wait until the Yankees rescue Greinke from the despair of Kansas City.

http://soxblog.projo.com/2009/05/joba-chamberlai.html

Something about Greinke's social anxiety disorder says to me that the Goat Fuckers are not in his future.

Clearly Joba's mother isn't a woman of god like your mother, DFFD...

Greinke also signed something like a 4-year extension during the off-season so he's not going anywhere. He was masterful last night.

Speaking of Joba, he's already allowed two hits and a 3-run HR against Bay in the first. It's already 4-0. It's already looking like it's going to be a long night for the Yankees.