Comic for Monday, February 4th, 2008

Posted: 7:55 am, Monday, February 4th

I'm not sure what made me think "Ernest P. Worrell! Comedy gold!", but here we find ourselves.

Man, seriously? Tom Coughlin won a Super Bowl? I can't stand that guy. Best ad of the night: Shaq on a horse. The urgency with which Shaq was directing that horse was better acting than he even turned out in any of those movies he was in in the mid-90s.

I take a special pleasure in the downfall of this particular self-righteous Look-at-me-I'm-Christian!!1! douchebag. I saw a story on some news show about this jerk last year - he edits the sex and swearing and probably the violence out of movies and re-sells them as clean edits. First, I don't know how that's even close to legal, and second, as someone who can vaguely be considered an artist, that just pisses me off to no end. It's like if somebody MS Painted over Pete's dialogue balloons and had him talking about puppies all the time. (Which could be funny, actually.)

We need a new coffee table, but I doubt 2.0 will let me get this. I wish we lived somewhere where I had a Man Room, because I would totally get this.

Two great YouTubes, one of which had embedding turned off (I didn't even know you could do that), so I'm linking to both. We caught the end of Spaceballs the other day (wow, that doesn't hold up well), and I looked up what else Princess Vespa was in, because it was bugging me. She was Jo on Melrose Place, as it turns out - although I thought I knew her from something else because I don't think I've ever seen a full episode of Melrose - and got her start in The Dorm That Dripped Blood.

The other one comes with a brief set-up from Tree, just back from Europe:

Oh man, watch this video. MTV Europe delivers again.

Ye gods.

There was a nice story in the City section of the Times yesterday. It didn't have much of a point other than "things change," but I enjoyed reading it, anyway. Some choice quotes:

My own internal map of the city was informed entirely by the subway map. I didn’t realize until an alarmingly late age that the map was not to scale but schematic (and highly Manhattan-centric). In other words, I didn’t know that Queens continued for another five miles after the end of the F line, or that the little green hexagon of Prospect Park was actually more than two-thirds the size of Central Park, or that Staten Island was almost three times as big as Manhattan (and was part of New York).

It took me a shamefully long time to figure that out, myself. And on trying to play football in Central Park:

Yet as soon as they took to the field a park security guard came by and asked them to leave. The park, it turns out, was trying to grow its grass, so park officials didn’t want anyone to step on it. After being kicked off four different fields, my brother and his friends headed back to the subway in a state of bewilderment.

This happened to me, too, like five years ago. Somehow, the 5-man game of football we were playing was a no-go, but the peewee soccer game next to us was OK. (Quick aside, this was hilarious game of football. We had a full-time QB, and then it was a buddy of mine and I from the office, versus our French coworker and his also-French cousin. The French were just head and shoulders above us, athletically, but had never played football before, and were actually too fast for their own good. We just ran stop-and-go routes the whole game and they'd fall over biting on the fakes. It was a slaughter, but if we had played them in soccer, I don't know if I ever would've touched the ball.)

I have some other stuff, but this is already getting long and I should be getting a move on. Congrats if anyone out there is actually a Giants fan - I guess Reggie Ho, if he's reading - and it's only eleven days until pitchers and catchers report. Oh, and vote tomorrow.

bullfrog

Bullfrog -- Monday, February 4 2008, 07:51 am

I just had a moment of panic and had to check that the W actually *did* stand for Walker. That would've been embarrassing.

Wow, first the Sox and now the Giants. If the Rangers win the Stanley Cup I may have to retire from sports watching, having hit the trifecta.

I'm probably pretty safe from that happening.

Zero

I am holding out for the Sox and Irish to hit on the same year. Man, if Justin Tuck had stayed for his senior year, we totally would've gone 12-0 in '05. (And probably lost to Texas in the title game, but, hey, we would've been in the title game.)

Darn you, Tuck, and your insane sense of loyalty to the Moulder!

Ann Coulter in a role that will shock you:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=HuTqgqhxVMc

My head asplode.

Stanley Fish with a good op-ed on Hillary Hating in the Times today.

http://fish.blogs.nytimes.com/?8dpc

gloriously slow and tired today from all the champagne last night - i made t break out the first bottle after brady's second consecutive sack.

i've no particular loyalty to the giants, but it just feels good that maybe, possibly, patriot fans will shut the hell up today. 20 weeks of fellating tom brady in the media got me all cranky, and having lived in patriot country for years and being a good fan to my team back home only to be surrounded by a-holes, i finally sank to their level and cheered when those bastards went down. great team, obviously, but obnoxious fans and media coverage.

am i alone in thinking that they are the worst fans ever, or am i biased because they keep beating us in afc playoff games?

I keep wondering who was more excited at the game last night: Peyton or Eli?

The only Patriots fan I know is Sweaty, and he's mildly tolerable. (Full disclosure: I was rooting for the Pats based on dislike of the Giants and Tom Coughlin and the Manning family as a whole, although Eli is miles more likable than his douche brother.)

Ranking "worst fans ever" in a universe where Yankee fans still exist is just plain silly, though, Drolett.

Crap, I guess I need to lay off the "De Niro will schill anything" jokes now.

http://cityroom.blogs.nytimes.com/2008/02/04/empty-seats-but-spirit-of-upset-at-obama-rally-at-meadowlands/

Eli's OK, but I wanted Plaxico to get his. Does your dislike of Coughlin really stop you from enjoying such a crazy 4th quarter, and the subsequent citywide partying that ensued? Last night I wished I still lived there, then I thought about how I didn't have to pay $2400 for a one-bedroom in a convenient area and I felt better.

Hey, go Irish. We're 21/22 in the polls.

No, Pat, not at all. That was a crazy fourth quarter. If an Irish QB had made that throw to Tyree, I probably would've had a freaking heart attack.

"Plaxico to get his" - you were rooting for him? Against him? I can't tell from context, and I forget if he left the Steelers acrimoniously or not.

FULL FRONTAL PETE!