Comic for Tuesday, January 8th, 2008

Posted: 7:35 am, Tuesday, January 8th

Oh, boy, is jury duty exciting. I guess I can't talk much about it yet, but I don't think it's violating anything to say that the Juror Orientation video kicked off with this ludicrous re-enactment of a 13th-century "trial by ordeal." You know, the sort of thing where they chuck you in a river and if you float, you're guilt, and if you drown, you're innocent. They should've tried to get the license from Monty Python for the clip from Holy Grail. "And what else floats in water?" "Very small rocks." Anyway, craziest thing about that video was actually that it was hosted by Ed Bradley and Diane Sawyer, who must've been doing community service for some otherwise extremely well covered-up DUIs or something.

I have very little else today. StarTropics is coming to the Wii, which is sweet because that was a totally awesome game with horrid game control. I probably won't be spending five or six bucks on it because I have it as a ROM, but it's highly recommended as a game itself. It's kind of Zelda-ish, in the Bahamas, just with lousy play control. Also, you had to dunk the instruction manual in water to get a secret code for a sub at one point - 747. I remember this, eighteen years later. Sigh.

I drew some last night, since 2.0 was feeling under the weather and turned in early; my thumb is still healing, exactly where I need it to play the PS3; and I have no interest in either watching tOSU embarrass itself again or LSU giving that boob with the doofy hat a national title. I was listening to the NewsHour while drawing, because I really know how to get down. Anyway, you know how when you're just hearing someone's audio sometimes, their voice sounds different? I guess because it's so isolated, or whatever? I never would've thought this had I seen him delivering his lines, but Mitt Romney sounds *exactly* like Pat O'Brien (former sportscaster, former "Insider" - an Entertainment Tonight/Extra rip-off, former rehab-goer). Has anyone else noticed this? That alone ought to be enough to tank him.

Anyway, the rest of that segment was just GOP candidates being ridiculous.

Huckabee: New Hampshire declared its independence six months before the rest of the country finally came around to what you guys had figured out.

Pander much?

Giuliani: I'm the candidate that can run in all 50 states.

You're not, actually. Although I'm hoping he wins the nomination because it would give me an excuse to post this Agnostic Front track over and over again for the next ten months: (OK, I was going to upload the song, but that little eSnips thing I've been using evidently can tell if something's a suspected copywrite now, so that sucks. So here's a video of Police State, um, shot in a dark cellar somewhere. But it had the best audio quality on Netflix, so, yeah.)

(NSFW)

Ah, good times. So, hey, go New Hampshire tonight. I can think of nothing more appropriate for a New Hampshire resident to do to mark the 1st day of the 51st week of the 29th year of Tree's life than vote for Barack Obama in the state primary. (Oh, fuck, Tree!)

bullfrog

Bullfrog -- Tuesday, January 8 2008, 07:18 am

Forgot to stick this in the body - the one bit of the game I did see last night coincided with this insane sweater that JaMarcus Russell was wearing. In HD, the thing practically exploded my retinas.

http://awfulannouncing.blogspot.com/2008/01/more-on-that-j-marc-cosby-sweater.html

It's hard to read in a screencap, but his necklace says "Bama Boy" and has a big elephant in it. Does JaMarcus know that LSU and Alabama are kind of rivals these days?

I don't read many (any) conservative commentators - the closest I come is whenever Brooks talks on NewsHour, and I think he's just about to throw his hands up in disgust at the GOP - so I really had no idea who this Kristol dude was that just got himself a Times column. By his description as "prominent conservative commentator", I figured he was an idiot, and, hey! I'm right!

http://www.villagevoice.com/news/0802,tomorrow,78782,9.html

I think my faith in Chuck Norris is shattered because I've seen him with the Huckabee camp. Although I'd think he'd make a really good Secretary of State guy.

At the rate this writers strike is going, which may include an actors strike (their contract is up really soon), we may have finally seen the death of reality shows, by just getting the audience sick and tired of them. (Or they may have already swelled up the World of Warcraft numbers.)

I had absolutely no idea what Reggie Ho's comment yesterday meant until today. Good job, Landri.

Yeah, Huckabee has an ad that goes, "What would I do about immigration control? Two words: Chuck. Norris."? I had no idea. I just - I just ... God. Yeah, good idea, Huck. Let's scrap the IRS in exchange for a 40% sales tax that beats the fuck out of working people, and let's make jokes about domestic policy based on '80s action stars. I hear Rambo's back in action - let's send him over to the Middle East! WHOOOO!

Wow - an incredible pictorial guide of Brutus Buckeye's evolution through the years is about 1/3 the way down this page.

http://sundaymorningqb.com/story/2008/1/6/195210/1576

Interesting article about poetry and prose from the Post... http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/01/07/AR2008010702263.html?hpid=opinionsbox1

Thing is - wasn't Bill Clinton mainly a good speaker? he didn't really run on substance, he ran on the fact that he could create emotion about just about anything. And he was a fantastic figurehead for the country in that way. To me, it seems that's mainly what a President is, a figurehead, symbol - but they don't necessarily get to create a lot of policy...

A second straight day, by the way, where I have no idea what I was doing in the fourth panel. It's too bad for all of you that these are among my favorite kind of strips.

I liked Dances with Wolves. Of course, it helps if you've driven through Kansas.

And it's clearly proven that Ohio State still can't figure out what do against 21st century offenses. But hey, you've beaten Michigan for the umpteenth straight time. Maybe when you've matured to the point where such rivalries aren't nearly as important as say, winning the still mythical National Championship, then maybe you'll start to be taken semi-seriously.

(I wasn't talking to the team, but rather to the Buckeye fans.)

Maybe JaMarcus's (JaMarci, JaMarcorum) jewelry was in support of Barack (O)Bama.

Huh? Huh!?!

Oh, God, that was just awful.

(And it would've needed a donkey, then, instead of an elephant. Somebody must've been sick the day in fifth grade when they taught you about political cartoons!)

Shoot. I even make bad jokes badly.

It's alright, man, I still love you.

I'm guessing this is a comment on the polls? I think Tinsley's back in the bottle.

http://www.chron.com/apps/comics/showComick.mpl?date=20080108&name=Mallard_Fillmore

Crazy...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/WORLD/asiapcf/12/30/india.wombs.for.rent.ap/index.html?eref=rss_mostpopular

I can see it now. For rent. One womb with a spectacular view of Indian Ocean. Prefers non-smoking male...no pets!

NYTimes says Obama has 16 votes thus far, Clinton 3, Edwards 3. Woo! McCain is leading on the Republican side.

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/08/us/politics/08cnd-campaign.html?hp=&adxnnl=1&adxnnlx=1199822544-wDbgDsu1W39CJxc2bAnEsg

I would actually really like to see an Obama-McCain campaign in the general election -- both serious men who I respect, who have a good chance of being elected, and who have all their baggage out of the way, so we might have some real conversation.

McCain lost all of my respect at the '04 RNC.

Yeah, McCain lost me by selling out on the torture issue. But I can tolerate him way more than anyone else on the GOP ticket. Which I guess is why I'm rooting against him.

Frankly, I'd like the comedy of Giuliani trying to appeal to the South for six months.

Hat tip to The Derek Landri Formerly Known as Reggie Ho for this - someone gave Knoblauch a vote for the Hall of Fame. Say what?

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/baseball/mlb/01/08/hall.2008.ap/index.html?cnn=yes

Holy shit, the World Series Trophy is supposedly coming to Professor Thom's on Friday!

i couldn't be more happy that landri proved what a beast he is in the pros, but it would have been great if he hadn't spanked the steelers in the process.

Damn you, New Hampshire, you bunch of survivalist nutbags! (I kid. But, seriously, damn you.)