Comic for Friday, March 2nd, 2007

Posted: 8:40 am, Friday, March 2nd

A version of this strip occurred in one of the defensive driving courses I've taken over the years (my mom makes me sign up for them whenever they're offered at the school she works at - you get 10% of insurance rates for taking them), where I began to get testy with the most cautious driver in the room who wouldn't shut up. My girlfriend from collitch was the most trepedatious driver I've ever met, to the point of being dangerous, and it's always been one of my hot-button issues ever since. Also, as 2.0 would happily tell you, I enjoy telling other drivers that they're morons.

By the way, speaking of people I don't like, one of my not-favorite people from the office and I were stuck at the elevator banks yesterday and wound up making small talk about the weather (I hate doing this, but it beats me telling him what I actually think of him). I mention that it's supposed to pour rain overnight (and, evidently, into the morning - my legs and feet are thoroughly soaked right now and I am very unhappy) and he says, "That's strange, March is always 'in like a lamb, out like a lion.'"

Me: "No, I think you have that reversed. It's in like a lion, out like a lamb, because spring is coming.

Moran from work: "Are you sure?"

Me: [100% sure, idiot.] "Gee, I think."

Other moran in the elevator: "No, he's right. In like a lamb, out like a lion."

What the hell? Who asked you? And how are you both wrong? Beginning of March = still winter. End of March = spring. Winter = cold, blustery, windy. Spring = warm, sunny, birds chirping. These tools probably think that April flowers bring May showers, too.

I loved Elephant and have just in the last month and a half – the same time period, you may notice, that my laptop’s been out of commission and I have therefore been cut off from any new music – gotten into Get Behind Me Satan. So it’s nice to know the White Stripes have taken up instruments against their aggressors once more.

And, gee, that's about it. I think I'm moving my computer into a new brightly colored "drywall cube" that is vaguely reminiscent of an office, so I may be out of touch for a few hours. I know you're all simultaneously very impressed and thrown into a mass panic over what to do in my absence, but I'm sure you'll soldier through it.

bullfrog

I think you're all wrong. I heard it as: If March comes in like a lion, it goes out like a lamb; or if it comes in like lamb, it goes out like a lion.

Huh, found something backing that up on the interweb.

http://www.abcteach.com/Activities/MarchColoring.htm

I swear I've never heard it that way. Maybe the Marches back when I was a kid were always really harsh in the beginning.

i always heard "in like a lion, out like a lamb" growing up, too

I suspect that somewhere along the way somebody changed it to the version I heard to accomodate the times when weather is nice at the beginning of March. Or maybe my version only applies to Smarch. Lousy Smarch weather.

Interesting Explainer today about the reward of heavenly virgins for suicide bombers.

http://www.slate.com/id/2160963?nav=tap3

Clooney had a great line - I think - Rolling Stone a year or so ago, "I'd rather six professionals."

Dammit, I meant to make a lousy Smarch weather comment yesterday. Best Treehouse of Horrors ever.

Oh, wait, no, that wasn't the same one with the Shinnin', was it? Because that was the best Treehouse ever.

Best:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treehouse_of_Horror_V

Second best:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treehouse_of_Horror_IV

Third best:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treehouse_of_Horror_VI

Boy, I sure do like the early 90s.

Jeremiah's road rage is the only drawback to my refusal learning how to drive stick (something I refuse to do so I can never be asked to move the car).

rather my refusal TO learn to drive stick

Re: lions and lambs, I thought it's variable. For instance, if March 1 is a shitty day (it was here), then March 31 will be nice, and vice versa.

Also I hate muhfuckaz who be sayin' "vice-a-versa".

Re: Treehouse of Horrors. I'd flip VI and IV. But you're dead on with V as the best. I commonly quote the "Urge to kill fading, fading... rising... fading,... gone." line. Sadly, lately it's been after ND losses.

Things removed from my desk so far:

Four rulers, two staple removers, a pair of scissors, a thing of masking tape, twenty-five pens.

Roughly 5000 sheets of paper from an aborted survey dated 2004 that I had intended to use as sketch paper (I evidently planned on doing a lot of sketching).

Five softballs.

Invoices to be filed dating back to October of 2000, before I worked here (these are especially awesome because we've moved office buildings between then and now - so I actually transported then-four-year-old papers to be filed and proceeded to hold onto them for three more years before finally tossing them).

3.5-inch disks that are the original version of Quark with the serial number that all my upgrades rely on.

A shit-ton of binder clips. Actually, I've left all those sitting here for the time being.

The cover of the January 30, 2001 Village Voice, "Hail to the Chimp." Because my hate is old school, yo.

I am the tosser to Jeremiah's saver. We are a match made in heaven!

Apparently, there was great meaning to Lost featuring Shambala and not Brickyard Blues, Black & White, Sure As I'm Sittin' Here, or any of Three Dog Night's many other awesome songs.

http://www.stereogum.com/archives/004747.html

And, yes, clearly the chasing after the VW was derivative of Little Miss Sunshine. But the end of Little Miss Sunshine was derivative of Napoleon Dynamite, so whatever. But it would've been *hilarious* if Sawyer did the Steve Carrell-run down the hill to catch up with the bus. Man, that would've been funny.

Well, can we all agree that weather-wise, March is a bitch? Especially this March?

* minor spoiler alert *

How was the ending of Little Miss Sunshine derivative of Napoleon Dynamite? Are you talking about the choreographed dance routines?

*More minor spoilers*

Yeah. It wasn't as straight of a lift as Lost-Little Miss Sunshine, but the family breaking awful tension with a screwy dance routine was.

Not that I didn't enjoy Little Miss Sunshine - I enjoyed it more than Napoleon Dynamite. Just sayin'.