Comic for Monday, September 25th, 2006

Posted: 12:20 am, Monday, September 25th

You'll pardon me for doing such a blatantly gratuitous ND fan-service and self-satisfying strip, I hope, in light of the ridiculous game on Saturday evening. 2.0's friends from the 585 were in town for a surprise party, and after finishing a lovely meal at the beyond-awesome Vatan, I happened to look into the window of Tonic East next door, and saw three seconds of the game, which corresponded with Drew Stanton throwing something like a billion-yard touchdown pass. My mood was instantly ruined, and Reggie Ho, acting on orders to text me while I was out being a good city-host, continued to darken my doorstep until my phone mercifully died and cut off the lines of communication with the Spartans leading 31-14.

The second bar we hit had a television, and I immediately gave up all pretense of wanting to speak to people to go watch the game. I was the only person in the entire friggin' bar watching TV - there was a band playing. (They weren't bad - all covers, and for God's sake, if you're going to cover Fake Plastic Trees, which is as close to a perfect song as I've ever heard, don't be so silly as to think you can improve it with little flourishes during the bridge. Do a straight note-for-note cover. If you have a Radiohead boot and they stretch it with some improv, then do a straight note-for-note of that. You are not going to improve Fake Plastic Trees. You're just not.) Somehow, a seat at the bar opened and I grabbed it in time for Brady's fifth touchdown pass. I stood on my chair and yelled at the television, and 2.0 came over to watch the end with me. Some Irish guy next to me said, "Mate, they're more important things in life than American football." I actually tried to explain to him the nature of my relationship with Notre Dame, but then just gave up and stopped paying any attention to him. When the game ended, I ran into the street and my mother called immediately. My entire night picked up from there, and I was ready to rock. Entirely too much of my emotional well-being is invested in Notre Dame football, I realize this, but, fuck, 19-0 in the fourth quarter to come back against Michigan State? Awesome.

As for guarding the 'S,' evidently John L.(oco) Smith assigned four back-ups to go stand on the 'S' at midfield to make sure there was no flag planted there. In the meantime, the Irish were singing the alma mater to the fans that had made the trip, and Charlie was getting a hug from his son (while the guardians looked on). That's just one of the silliest things I've ever heard of, guarding the 'S'. God. Sillier, though, was something Bob Davie said in the post-game wrap-up. "Games like this, I look at Charlie Weis, and I want to get back into coaching. Then I look at John L. Smith and never want to get back into coaching again." Bob, you haven't had one interview in the five seasons since we canned your sorry ass. You really have no say in the matter of your getting back into coaching. Ridiculous.

Oh, the other reason that I'm running such a self-referential strip as this today is that this is Big Number 500 for me. That's right, this is the 500th installment of Five Bucks to Friday. I'm counting a few double strips I've done (days when I've posted two), and the Katrina strip (but not the Five and Dimes, or the alternate-reality strip with the Zelda panel in it). So instead of a strip where the characters break the fourth wall (jargon!), I decided to treat myself with some Marco-style lunacy. Good times!

Anyway, a few random links. Let's Go Sox, which underwent a wild redesign while I wasn't paying attention (what with baseball season having ended a month ago), has a sweet old Wayne's World clip. Man, remember Wayne's World?

Little too much info about flying from this Economist piece...

I was doing some image research at the office the other day and stumbled upon the work of a French artist named Marguerite Sauvage, and I really dig it. There's some racy stuff in there that's not marked as such, but it pops up small and I doubt it'll trip any red flags, but if you're in an uptight office, bewares.

Since I sincerely doubt any of you were watching Fox News Sunday Morning yesterday, here's the video of Clinton's takedown of whatever suck-ass sucker was asking the questions on that show. It's long, but it's awesome. Clin-tonn the Destroyer eats this guy's lunch. It's awesome.

Anyway, back to business as usual tomorrow. Go Irish!

bullfrog

I may embed this in tomorrow's post, but here's an awesome clip of the Robot Genius perfectly utilizing Dr. Soong's emotion chip to fire up the D on Michigan State's final drive.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qNLsv8EYWE

I don't know whether to be amazed or insulted that Rutgers (yes, the State University of New Jersey, those scarlet knights) is ranked ahead of Missouri in the latest AP poll. (23rd and 25th respectively, and no, I don't expect either of them to keep their rankings for very long.)

Is there a sport that America still wins at on the International Scene?

Snowboarding. We are unstoppable at snowboarding, Lindsay Jacobellis's youthful enthusiasm notwithstanding.

Too bad were too classy of a team to plant a flag... cuz if there ever was a game to do it...

Love that Pete ganked Sparty's lid... cracked me up.

The way my week was going I figured ND getting blown out (again) was the capper. I'm glad the "Other Guy" came out after halftime (in case you missed it, Brady said in response to what adjustments were made at halftime - "We brought out the Other Guy", I think this game helps immensely for the rest of the season. Schedule gets much easier for a while (Purdue is a weak 4-0).

I'm taking nothing for granted with this squad, but I am miffed that sportswriters are already assuming that we have no shot against SoCal. Yeah, twenty points on the Arizona Wildcats. You're right, they're totally going to destroy us. I don't think you can average a season-ending injury to a running back per game and come out unscathed. That's just not sustainable.

As an alumnus of MSU for many years now, I would like to say I'm shocked, ashamed, and surprised by Saturday night's choke-ariffic performance. But as an alumnus of MSU for many years now, I am neither shocked nor surprised, and therefore feel no shame. Now if we can just beat the Blue and Corn . . .

Zero

I have to tell you, Zero, I almost didn't go with the Sparty helmet gag/'guarding the S' rant out of respect for you. But your constant digs on your alma mater's Fight Song and the general anger I feel from the Spartan community towards Johnelle emboldened me.

If John L. bothers to watch the game as it's happening and goes with his strength, I think you guys actually have a good chance against the Wolverines. You certainly have the offense for it.

And really, if I were a Michigan alumni, how would I not be looking forward to Ohio State - Michigan, possibly for all of the marbles (not just the Big 10 title, but the Bowl Championship Series National Championship Game kilbasa).

Having 11 members in the Big 10 always seems to suggest to me that one school is on the verge of relagation. This year, that team seems to be Illinois.

I also think in terms of Mascots that if you can have someone dressed in Roman Legionnaire attire, that's a whole lot better than a stuff mascot who looks like Popeye's long lost cousin. I mean, how bad would it be if the ND leprchaun (probably not spelled right) was a stuffed mascot?

Animal mascots, that's a whole other story.

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Man, if you're dumb enough to buy auto insurance from a blogspot site, you deserve whatever happens to you.

The Irish actually used to have a terrier - Slainte Joe - as their sideline mascot back in the 40s, speaking of live mascots. Not the same as Ralphie, but the logic of having a live buffalo stampede around a stadium has never really been apparent to me. (Although, I actually kind of like Sparty. His consistency of demented proportions is much less disconcerting than the big-head normal-body freakishness of Purdue Pete, or that inflatable nightmare that Nebraska sometimes trots out.)

One of the older guys in the office is a big Notre Dame fan, and he spends a lot of weekends out in Indy with his daughter. He just stopped by and told me that at Mass yesterday, the priest, a Purdue alum, announced at the end of Mass that it was a glorious weekend becasue Purdue won and Notre Dame lost. And 400 of the 700 people in attendance responded, at once, "No, they didn't."

Good times.

HAPPY 500TH!!!!!

Thanks, dude.

I particularly like Uga, the Georgia bulldog mascot. Not only does he bark at opposing players if they come near him, I've been told he pretty much stole the show in the movie version of Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evil.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to find a New Orleans style restaurant that has the NO-ATL game on.