Comic for Monday, March 6th, 2006

Posted: 7:42 am, Monday, March 6th

I can't tell you how long I've had this particular strip planned. Remember when I started this thing, I kept making reference to a script I had that would more or less carry me through the first six months or so? This was one of those strips. Kind of tacked on at the end and never well-developed. But I finally got it out of my system, only to realize that it actually had no punchline, more or less. Well, if one ain't there, it ain't there. I considered trying to force some sort of Grand Theft Auto reference in there, but a) I've talked about GTA quite enough, b) I've given up the PS2 for Lent, which is really neither here nor there and c) gee, I really only had one item in this list. Huh. I'll quickly change the subject and talk about how weird it is when I have to pull the camera back to show this much of the surroundings.

Did you guys know the Met is open 'til 8:45 on Friday nights? I wish I had known that before this weekend. As I mentioned, my li'l cousin was in town. She was an art major at collitch and had never been to the Met, but was working this show at the Javits from nine 'til six every day, and we were afraid we couldn't get her there. But turns out the Met's open late on Friday and Saturdays, which is awesome. It was the least crowded I've ever seen the place, and because it was pitch black outside, you felt like you were really there after hours. I'm not going to lie, I actually felt like a high roller of some sort, at a fund-raiser. (It doesn't take much, huh?) Anyway, highly recommended. And while you're there, you absolutely much check out the Studiolo from the Palace of Duke Federico da Montefeltro at Gubbio. This thing is freaking incredible. It's a little room off to the side on the way to the armor exhibits. Apparently, this dude got blinded in his right eye and commissioned a room to be built that, if you close your right eye and squat (or tip-toe) to be about 5'8", the woodwork pops into 3D. You can even kind of get the sensation from the enlarged photo on the page I just linked to - it looks like there's some depth to the woodwork, but there's not. It's 11,000 pieces of wood arranged to lay flat. Fucking crazy. I can't believe anyone even thought to do this, let alone actually take the time to do it. Evidently, there's some legible pages of the Aeneid, but I missed that. You can explore the room in crazy depth here. Seriously, it's an absolute must-see. Go. Now. Ditch work (you know you hate it, anyway).

And, yeah, that's about it. I'm watching the Academy Awards with 2.0 right now. What is the deal with all the montages? We've had montages of epics, montages of noire, montages of political activism - and Jon Stewart just made a joke about Oscar's upcoming tribute to montages. Nice line, Jon. Oh, and the French dudes with the penguins - between you guys and Life is Beautiful guy, the Academy will never honor a European ever again. Lily Tomlin and Meryl Streep are killing right now. And I'll stop. My cousin's left, so tomorrow's blog will be better. Thanks for bearing with me.

bullfrog

When you said killing did you mean in a good way or a bad way, because that tribute to Altman was the point I got up and walked away. Also, I thought Charlize Theron's dress with that bow on her shoulder was hideous, but just heard two sets of radio DJs compliment it.

But, Crash winning was a nice ending.

"Murderball" should have beaten "Penguins" for Best Doc.

Are you kidding me? Jessica Alba couldn't read the teleprompter right and Streep and Tomlin get out there and basically do an Altman scene for five minutes and you walked away? Geez, I loved that part. That bow on Theron's dress was horrible, though, you're right.

I wasn't huge on Murderball, but I was watching it with my parents, who absolutely *hated* it, so the experience was no doubted tainted by that.

That was the worst awards show Reggie has ever watched. Stewart was insecure and holding back so much that his sense of humor was horribly suppressed. Every clip from the movie Capote made my ears bleed. Why would I ever go see a movie where a guy talks like that? As if Yoda's voice wasn't weird, at least he was a four foot balding green Jedi. No excuse for the slovenly star of that movie. And, why have nothing really go on all night just to rush the last three most important awards?! Ugh, at least the MTV music awards are entertaining because there's always the possibility members of Rage will climb the set and not come down.

Bravo, Reese, you were the highlight of the night. Mr. Cash should have won for best actor as well.

Actually, one of the best parts of Hoffman's performance is that the voice doesn't irritate you for the entire movie. After about five minutes, you get used to it.

Stewart was too jittery, though, you're right.

I liked when that random-category woman got up and thanked the academy for sitting next to Clooney at the luncheon and then the camera flashed to him and he looked like he'd never met her before. I bet he has that look a lot.

I kind of blacked out every time Clooney was on camera because it's becoming increasingly evident that 2.0 would leave me in a heartbeat for him.

Not that I can blame her. In a Rolling Stone interview, Clooney was talking about 9/11 or something and said, "Who wants 72 virgins? Give me eight professionals." That's about the funniest thing I've ever heard.

Holy geez, CK liveblogged the whole Oscars. My morning is booked solid now.

http://chavelaque.blogspot.com/

She had rings on her fingers and bells on her shoes.

told7155@fivebuckstofriday.com

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mon8172@fivebuckstofriday.com