Comic for Monday, February 6th, 2006

Posted: 12:15 am, Monday, February 6th

The second panel is a little unclear, I'm afraid... Jen's talking to the tech dude, who is off-panel at the mo'. Is that horribly confusing? Lissa is reading Bone, by the way. I got the first two installments of the Scholastic colorized version of Bone for Christmas - it's fantastic. Just a wonderful story. It's like Walt Kelly meets Tolkien. I was tempted to just run out and get the complete Bone, but I think I'll wait for Scholastic to put out all nine of their colorized installments. I highly recommend it, at any rate, and feel dumb for not reading it while it was coming out monthly. I wish I could've had good taste in high school, instead of reading X-Force and WildC.A.T.s because Liefield and Lee drew well-endowed women.

2.0's off in Chicago visiting her gram right now, so I've been left on my own all weekend. It is a testament to my maturing process that I have actually put pants on at all this weekend. I was debating live-blogging the Super Bowl, since I'm home solo and will be watching the game anyway, but I think I'm going to get some stuff done once the Steelers commence the blow-out, so I'm just going to comment on things that come out of nowhere to catch my attention.

• I tuned in while Stevie Wonder was singing. Nice peace talk right there at the end. That Joss Stone chick has a really good voice, I had no idea. And I finally know how to pronouse Indi.Aire.
• I do believe I just saw a Seattle lime-green version of the Terrible Towel. Lame, guys. Almost as lame as your attempt at a cheese-head rip-off.
• (One of) the pre-game show(s) started with a strange little intro that kind of took us in one image each through the decades that the Super Bowl has existed for. The one for the 90s was the clip of Bill Clinton saying "I did not have sex with that woman." What neocon programmed that as the defining moment of the 90s?
• They're introducing the former Super Bowl MVPs right now - this is hilarious. Larry Brown got booed pretty thoroughly. I don't understand how Ray Lewis ever got acquitted of murder (or manslaughter, whatever it was). Joe Namath just flashed the gaudiest jacket-lining I've ever seen. Elaine Bennis's dad would kill him.
• Seattle is entering to Bitter Sweet Symphony, and Mick Jagger is laughing his ass off at Richard Ashcroft right now. Yep, definitely lime-green terrible towels. Wait, there was some guitar in that - was that the song the Verve ripped off, I guess?
• Sweet, the Steelers let Jerome run out there on his own. The Bus doesn't need a team. He's bad enough to beat some chump from BC all on his own. I can't believe I just now thought of the fact Hasselbeck went to BC. I don't just want the Steelers to win, now, I want them to make the Seahawks cry.
• Nice shout-out to the civil right movement right there. As you can see so far, every single thing is catching my attention. We're switching over to live-blogging.
• Hey, it's Aaron Neville. I don't know much about his music, just that he's a lyric in a Vic Chesnutt song. That the Pumpkins covered. I think that actually qualifies me as not knowing a single Goddamn thing about Aaron Neville's music.
• FUCK YOU CONDALEEZA RICE YOU NEOCON HATEMONGER.
• Oh, man, if the Stones play Sweet Neocon tonight, I will immediately purchase their entire discography off iTunes. And I realize that's about a five hundred dollar purchase.
• This live-blogging is brought to you be Coors Light. Because I forgot where the store with about ninety different beers was - they were my best chance for Iron City.
• Hey, Adam Sandler is making a movie based on my all-time favorite episode of Duck Tales. Awesome. Wow, they even used the baseball gag.
• What - the - hell. Harrison - Dr. - what - I - what - Indiana - Joe Mon - but - I - wow.
• Josh Scobey is a captain on Seattle? Why?
• The Seahawks have an o-lineman named Locklear. It's impossible to sound tough with the last name Locklear. If you make me think of Melrose Place and Bon Jovi at the same time, I'm not going to be intimidated by you, even if you do weigh 300 pounds.
• Wow, the Seahawks are hustling downfield. Pittsburgh's playing off the receivers. With the distance Polamalu can cover, I don't really understand why. You'll have safety help, you can play up a little.
• You know how I'm not really involved in this game? I'm taking time to comment on how much I hate the font ABC used during player introductions. It's like an italicized art deco font with extra serif. (Upon seeing it again, I guess we're going for old muscle-car lettering. I still don't like it, but at least it makes sense now.)
• Cool Bud Light ad where they hide the beers all over the office, but, uh, they'd all be warm.
• I don't eat fast food anymore, but if it makes you feel better, Burger King, your ads make me want to send you five bucks just 'cause.
• Al just tried to jinx Gardocki.
• This is a lot of D-list talent for a Sierra Mist ad.
• How does Anheuser-Busch decide to go with ads for Budweiser vs. Bud Light during the Super Bowl? Does the winner of the intra-company softball game get more ads?
• Why does the NFL place a higher premium on souvenir balls than getting the QBs a decent feel for the balls so they can throw it around better? That's ridiculous.
• "Why did you learn English?" asks the little boy in the Ford Hybrid ad. "For your future," answers the father, "because if America keeps voting the way they do, all non-English speakers will be slaughtered by the Republicans within twenty years."
• Another Bud Light ad! Budweiser must've gotten mercied out this year.
• Nice play by Marcus Trufant right there.
• No, Madden, Seattle was in a dime, not the Steelers. The Steelers were in a single-back formation. It's actually an easy call to make - see, the Steelers had the ball.
• I don't believe in ghosts, because if there were ghosts, Notorious BIG's ghost would've killed P. Diddy years ago.
• That a really weak push off by Darrel Jackson to get the offensive PI. Good call, just a really weak push off. Darrel Jackson killed my fantasy team a few years ago. So, good.
• Shocking, Troy Polamalu ran right by the guy with the ball. He's like a really fast sports car with no handling, the way he plays. He's a great player, but he would drive me crazy if he were on my team. I can't count the amount of Steelers he's taken out of plays during the playoffs by running into them in over-pursuit. I have to wonder if anyone would actually care about him if not for his hair.
• 3-0, Seattle; 4-0, Bud Light.
• Well, the good news is that the Steelers offense will be rested for the final three quarters. I have no idea who had Seattle 3, Pittsburgh 0 in squares, but they're in the money.
• I don't trust corporate synergy, but I'm *sure* it's just a coincidence that the player intro font matches that of Disney/Pixar's upcoming Cars. Can you tell I'm hung up on this font thing?
• No, Madden, the line of scrimmage was about thirty yards ahead of the action. It's not that hard of a call to make, it was on a punt.
• I was going to make a joke about a dude wearing a Hasselbeck jersey who looked just like Hasselbeck, but Al Michaels made it first. So never mind. Mine would've been better, though.
• Budweiser gets on the scoreboard.
• Again with the synergy, ESPN's cell-phone ad had a mention of Disney's Miracle in the background.
• I was trying to find '92 Sugar Bowl highlights of the Bus on Friday, but no luck.
• No, Madden, you didn't circle anything. What are you talking about?
• The last time I live-blogged a football game, I just remembered, was the Fiasco Bowl against Oregon State five years ago. That ended disastrously. Also, it was just a really long e-mail, as "blogging" was not a thing yet back then. Still, wondering if maybe I should stop doing this.
• Whoa! The New Escalade! Looks exactly like the old Escalade. Whoopdee shit.
• The ad's not on right now, but I've been meaning to say that I'm psyched that Oasis's All Around the World is in the new AT&T ads. I love that song. I really think Be Here Now was an underrated album, largely due to backlash against the Gallaghers proving themselves to be total dickmunches during the Morning Glory era. A wise man once said you have to separate the artist from the art. OK, so it was Tree, and he was talking about R. Kelly, but, whatever.
• Ow! I think they just broke Randle-El's back.
• It's not like Chris Berman had any dignity, but whatever he may've still had just went out the window with that Shaggy Dog ad. I don't know why I'd ever be in a position to do a voiceover for a movie, but if I ever do something like that, kill me.
• Hey! Kermit the Frog! In a hybrid ad. Sweet. 2.0 is probably very glad she's not here right now.
• Awesome play by Ward. And Big Ben.
• My all-time favorite Madden-ism: During the Packers-Patriots Super Bowl, he goes, "What makes Brett Favre such a good quarterback is that he has two knuckles on his feet." And then does not explain.
• Just heard from 2.0 - she was afraid I may've killed myself during the Kermit ad. I was OK with it even before I knew it was a hybrid ad, but then she said, "Good thing it wasn't an H3." Well, yes.
• No, Madden, Grant Winstrom will not always make that play. If he always made that play, he would actually sack the QB on every single drop-back. That's the definition of always making that play.
• Holy shit, that Roethlisberger pass to Ward right there was crazy. That's the sort of play that used to make Tree throw the controller at me while playing NCAA.
• Nice! There's a 6 jersey while the Bus is in at the goal line. Jerome just got stuffed, though. I'd run a play-action naked boot with Big Ben right now on third.
• Has anybody else seen the original Poseidon Adventure? It was really pretty cool.
• OK, Gillette - seriously, it's just a fuckin' razor. No matter how many blades and lotion strips you add, it's really not that hard to shave.
• Who called that play? There's a reason I'm 124-0 at NCAA.
• And we're under review. Well, it was still a good call.
• Over, these overstock.com ads - who else thought they were ads for a new Lifetime channel or something? Do they not know what "the big O" actually means?
• That's a touchdown. It's not when he comes to the ground - if the ball crosses at any point, it's a touchdown. It broke the plane while he was in the air, there. What's so hard about this? Evidently nothing. Good job, ref.
• You may have noticed that the Steelers did not do the swinging gate formation on the point after. That's a good sign - it means Ty Willingham is not your coach.
• I'm not saying Seattle's an anonymous team or anything, but all the ads with the Lombardi trophy have had Steelers in them so far.
• Is this working for anyone else? I'm entertaining myself. Not getting a damn thing done, but at least I'm entertaining myself. I guess this is not technically live-blogging, since I won't post it 'til well after the game is over...
• I will say this for the NFL: It goes much faster than collitch football. Also, I have not been subjected to any shots of Brady Quinn's sister yet. Did you guys know she was dating AJ Hawk?
• The Seahawks helmet looks like the canoe I used to have for my Playmobil Indian guys. Or maybe it was their totem pole? I think it was their totem pole. At any rate.
• Holmgrem just took a page out of the Andy Reid playbook by not really hustling his team to the line as time ran running out in the half - and then the Steelers took a timeout? What the hell was that? At least they're playing the Foo Fighters over the stadium PA. Oh, I get it - they're from Seattle. If we're sticking to just the music from the two cities, how did the Stones get involved?
• I would really like the Stones to play You Can't Always Get What You Want. We have any Stones fans out there? I only own Let It Bleed. SKT, you like the Stones - what's their best album?
• Seriously, terrible end of the half by Seattle. When you're so clueless that Madden is up in your grill about it, that's not a good sign.
• The Desperate Housewives ad: I love Tony Hawk. I hate Matt Leinart. I don't know how to feel about this ad.
• Why do SUVs stress how long they are in ads? That's really kind of disturbing.
• At least ABC ran the worst possible promo for Lost I could ever imagine. Wow, that brutal. Who was the ad wizard that said, "You know how we should promo the most popular show on TV? Rick Springfield." (OK, so CSI I guess is more popular - whatever.)
• Doesn't, uh, Sprint present the Sprint halftime show? The NFL presents the Sprint halftime show? I don't know if that's actually how that works.
• Wow, the Stones open with Start Me Up. NO ONE COULD HAVE PREDICTED THAT.
• Remember Windows 95?
• Mick should give this event all the respect it deserves with a big ol' Hellooooooooooo Cleveland! That would also make me buy their back catalog.
• Now I want a Snickers bar.
• Mick needs to work on his triceps.
• Things I don't want to hear Mick Jagger ever friggin' complain about: how little girly action he gets. At no point in his career could he honestly make that complaint.
• This was so much better than the Paul McCartney halftime show last year.
• This is why 2.0 was worried about the Kermit ad earlier: I am legitimately pissed that Hemingway was just used in an E-trade ad. I am actually imagining what Papa would do to the dude who put him in that ad. It involves a broken whiskey bottle. Or throwing the guy into the bullfighting ring.
• I don't think I've ever noticed the Louisiana quarter before. It's got a trumpet, a pelican, and the Louisiana Purchase on it. I guess they have a lot of pelicans down there? I still prefer the basic eagle design to any of the state designs. Why'd they change that? Who doesn't like quarters? Who doesn't use quarters? I don't get it.
• That was the most useless mic'ing of a player I've ever seen.
• Nice call. Good run. Good job, Fast Willie. Pat and AD Creany Attorney at Law both just blew capillaries yelling at their respective televisions.
• How much do you think Sharpie stock has gone up since it's been determined that they're the only pens on the planet that can write on CDs?
• "Max Strong." He has the name you want to touch, but you must not touch it.
• Yes, Madden, you do see Polamalu miss a lot. I'm doing a Yoda voice right now: "You are wreckless."
• I kind of expected Joey Porter to run up and kick Jeramy Stevens in the nuts after he dropped that pass.
• I hope this thing works for people if they're not watching the game *as* I'm typing it. If not, boy, have I just wasted an evening.
• We're 4-2 for Bud Light, but that ad with the Clydesdales pushing the - HOLY SHIT, IT'S FABIO. This can't be real. Where's the Energizer bunny - and, yeah, it's not real. Whew.
• NFL on the phone ad: "We ate non-organic food and we liked it!" And now we have strange hormone imbalances. Thank you, FDA.
• Oh, I was going to sacrifice any cool cache I may've tricked you all into giving me by saying that the ad with the Clydesdales pushing the cart for the baby Clydesdale was really cute. Yep, that's right - really cute. Oh, yeah. I'm lame.
• Give it to Jerome! Six yards for the Bus. I want to see the Bus in the end zone. C'mon, Steelers, get to a goal line situation again.
• Nice big run by Jerome after the sweet pass to Ward. Whooo, Jerome! I kind of expected the Bus to pull back and pass on that pitch play just now, not going to lie. I don't like the pitch call right there.
• A pregnant Godzilla in an ad? Who're the ad wizards that came up with - oh. Hummer. That explains it. You know that ad where the little boy tells his mom it's OK to pull up to the front of his new school, because she's driving an H2? If I were a millionaire, I'd make an ad that starts that same way, except the kids hanging out in front of the school charge the kid and beat the living snot out of him after he gets out of that abomination of a car.
• HUGE MOMENTUM SHIFT. Terrible pass by Roethlisberger. What the hell was that? Underthrown by a mile, and the dude was covered, anyway. Woof.
• Oh boy, Stevens caught a TD. Joey Porter's head asplode.
• 14-10, Pittsburgh. 8 and 1 are looking more unlikely by the minute.
• I would actually go for it on 4th and 1 at the 29 right now, but I've had a few beers.
• "We're on five-second delay," says Al, so he doesn't want to risk a guess why they had to take a dude's pants off to check for an injury. Yeah, Al, I'm sure it was for something that you'd get an FCC fine for mentioning. They were checking his hammy, not, you know, relieving any tension.
• Is it Mike Strong? I can't really understand Michaels. If it's Mike Strong, you can touch that name, it's a little less intimdating.
• Prediction: Randle-El does not leave his feet during this return.
• Anyone watch Grey's Anatomy? I like Sandra Oh (at least, I did in Sideways), and I'm curious to know what a Code Black is. But I doubt I'm going to watch it. If you watched it, fill me in in the comments.
• I don't know about passing on 3rd and 2 right there, Steelers. Especially when Big Ben could've actually run for the first without taking another shot on his shoulder. But the punt was downed at the two, so we'll call that a wash.
• Suzy Kolber sounds like she's telling us a ghost story right there. "And then he sat his receivers down one by one and told them" about the dude with the hook for a hand. Or about Pittsburgh's defensive alignment, one or the other.
• 14-10 at the end of the third.
• Wow, the Benny Hill theme song. Didn't expect that to happen.
• The fact that Casey Hampton can be considered an athlete just blows me away.
• I think the only way I'm seeing any money here is if Pittsburgh scores to go up 21-10, and Seattle get a field goal to get to 21-13, then scores a touchdown with about thirty seconds left, goes for two and makes it, and then Pittsburgh returns the kick to win 28-21 as time expires. Does that add up?
• Huge holding call right there. And there's Casey Hampton. Wow. I bet he could punch a cow out cold.
• Michaels finally just mentioned that Polamalu hasn't done anything the whole game. This is because he's a damn dirty Trojan.
• Whoo, big pick by Ike Taylor there. Interesting personal foul call on Hasselbeck - how does the quarterback throw a pick and then get whistled for an illegal block? (Al Michaels actually explained this after the ad. It was an incorrect call, evidently.)
• I'm pretty sure I'm going to run out and get me a Chipwich at the end of this game.
• Emerald Nuts: You're trying too hard. You will never supplant Planters. Just give it up with the PB Max rip-off ads.
• Tom Selleck: The only man in TV history to date Murphy Brown and Monica Gellar. That's something for the ol' resume.
• There's a Roethlisberger run on 3rd and 2 for the first. Should've happened last possession, too. I'm pretty sure Big Ben ran fairly often in colltich - granted, it was against MAC defenses, but.
• Hey! Randle-El on a little reverse to Ward for seven. Alright, Seattle, kick a field goal on the next possession. We can do 28-21 for a final, I know we can. Man, that was a nice pass, too. It's always handy having a converted QB at receiver. Of course, for the three or four straight QBs Notre Dame converted to another position, I don't think we ever ran a trick play with them. Astoundingly, I think it was in 2002 or 2003, Notre Dame could've fielded an offesnive formation that featured four players that had taken a snap at quarterback at one time in their career. Carlyle Holiday would've taken the snap from center, Arnaz Battle would've been at wide receiver, and Gary Godsey and Jared Clark would've been the two tight ends. To make things even more perfect, Holiday later lost his starting spot at QB and became a wide receiver. And yet Bill Deitrich would only ever call a run up the middle.
• Wow, Pirates of the Caribbean 2 and MacGyver in the same commerical break. That's an all-timer right there.
• That's all the contact you need to be ruled down by contact? Really? I had no idea.
• Is anyone still reading this?
• Things I basically only do when 2.0 leaves town: Watch the Lord of the Rings movies, and eat at Hot Diggity Dog. It's not like she's especially objected to either, but these things only seem to happen if she's out of town, and they *always* seem to happen when she's out of town.
• I am still watching the game, I swear. For instance, Townsend just absolutely destroyed Hasselbeck. Nobody blocked him. Wow, that was big.
• Seattle's punter is not real good at angling the ball out of bounds, I've noticed.
• This March, for the first time ever, spring training is organized by country and not by MLB team. "I'll be there for my country," says Roger Clemens, who has proven throughout his career that he is loyal to one thing and one thing only: his country's currency. Or Canada's currency. I guess, really, he's not loyal to anything. Oh well. Realizing that the stakes were completely different, what was lamer: OJ's not really trying to fit into those gloves lamer, or Clemens saying "I thought [the jagged chunk of broken bat that he threw at Mike Piazza in the World Series] was the ball.". (In case you're not a baseball fan, there is not a single play in the sport that would require you to throw the ball *at* a base runner.)
• Charlie Batch just got a mention. I think XFL MVP Tommy Maddox got a shoutout earlier, so it's good to see Chaz get his props.
• Nice weird shovel-screen to Randle-El to keep the clock running.
• JEROME!
• 3:51 left and Seattle's having to spend time outs. With 3:51 left in the game, if this were a collitch game, it would be like quarter of midnight right now. Why is the NFL capable of moving a game right along, while the NCAA, which puts on about six or seven times *more* contests in a season, takes a fortnight to stage a game?
• I think Big Ben just picked up the game-cliching first down.
• I would love it if Jerome somehow busted one for the distance here.
• Is Randle-El the MVP here? I don't think you can give it to Roethlisberger. Maybe Ward? I guess Fast Willie has the best stat line, but that was mostly just one play.
• Re: the preview for Running Scared. I have no idea what I just saw, but it sure looked terrible.
• Likewise: Outback - that was a terrible ad.
• "There are two words no emergency room surgeon ever wants to hear." "We have a Code Black." I know what you're getting at, but that's actually five words. Four if you don't count 'a'. I'm still not going to watch your show. But feel free to show me another ad for it. I'm sure you will, anyway.
• Pass underneath when you're down two scores with no timeouts and under two minutes. That's what you get for having a QB who went to Boston Collitch.
• Wow, that was a hideously ugly pass out to Strong there on 2nd and 10.
• Another one on 3rd and 10. The lesson here is never to draft a QB from Boston Collitch unless you're the CFL and the QB in question is five foot four. Even I can't hate on Flutie.
• Seriously, I need like a cookie or something. I'm pretty sure I am sans cookie in the house right now, too. Shoot.
• Stevens stays in bounds. Wow, this is the worst clock management I've seen in a Super Bowl since last year.
• The Barber brothers drop to 1-2 in the Super Bowl with Seattle's loss. Good job, Steelers. I win precisely no money at all on the NFL this season, Jerome gets his trophy, Stacked will either be extremely joyous or completely incomprehensible tomorrow, and Bill Cowher almost smiled for a second there.
• The Steelers fan on my block just broke some glass out in the street and started screaming. Good times!
• Can the Stones come back and play You Can't Always Get What You Want to the Seahawks?
• Ward gets the MVP. They give him a Caddy. At Ford Field.
• The Bus! Wait, why am I still watching this? I want a Chipwich.
• Whoa, the Bus just retired. Well, that was something. Go Irish!

Alright, just read this through, and it seems acceptable. I think it gets me out of having to do any more blogging for tomorrow, too. Further, this is by far the most substantial post I've ever had on a Monday. I think we're all winners here. Except for the Seattle Seahawks. Oh well. You'll always have Steve Largent.

In signing off, Seton Hall's Jamar Nutter lead his squad over Rutgers and their star player, Quincy Douby. They were playing in the Beavis Invitational Classic.

bullfrog

Just a little ND - bball update for all those of you out there who are not, like me, obsessed. The Irish managed to lose by 3 points in overtime. how did they get to OT, you ask? well, b/c L'ville managed to hit a LAST - SECOND 3 point shot (that was well guarded, btw). ARGH. That now makes 8 losses by a grand total of 27 points. damn.

The ONLY part of the Super Bowl I caught last night was the coin toss....and my man Harrison Ford participating in a modified recitation of "Oh, The Places You'll Go" just before the coin toss. Can someone explain that to me, please? What does Indy have to do with football and Dr. Seuss? I'm TiVo-ing the Today Show this morning since he's a guest, but just in case the answer doesn't come up in the interview....what the...?

I watched Grey's Anatomy. I'd never seen it before - some guy built his own World War II bazooka and accidentally fired it on himself (because a guy smart enough to build a gun is NOT, apparently, smart enough to stay away from the barrel when he's playing with the trigger). Anyway, the code black was because the bazooka bullet (or whatever you call it) was in his stomach and undetonated. They had to call in the bomb squad and all. Sooo- code black is a bomb threat, I guess. The hospital was going to EXPLODE!

Totally ridiculous, but pretty compelling nevertheless....

I opted to watch the simpsons instead of the superbowl. I haven't watched the simpsons in a few years, but last nights episodes were awesome. And since I didn't watch the game, it's hard to compare, but I'm going to go out on a limb and say reading this post was better than watching the game.

And, i like exile on main street, but it's also the only stones album that i own.

Secretary, deadspin.com said it best, "It's common knowledge that Harrison Ford is stoned all the time, right? Everyone knows this?"

That's what a code black was? I was hoping it was a zombie virus in the hospital.

Does anyone know if people got special tix to be on th field during the Stones concert? Because somehow every single person in the "tongue" was wearing a primary colored shirt. I don't see how that was a coincidence.

His name is Mack Strong, which is pretty much the perfect football player's name.

This article is pretty rough on the Stones from last night - I actually thought that was a really good halftime show, but that's born of extremely low expectations of what a halftime show should be. But the coolest thing about this is the list of all the halftime entertainment through the years - Up With People has done halftime of the Super Bowl four times. That's a riot.

http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2006/football /nfl/specials/playoffs/2005/02/05/entertainment.ap/index.htm l

Other highlights: New Kids on the Block was the halftime show in 1990, and "Michael Jackson and 3,500 children" came a few years after that. There's an all-time good idea. I remember that one and almost made reference to it last night - it opened with "Michael" doing a dance on the top of one of the scoreboards or something, then "disappearing" in a puff of smoke and "reappearing" at the 50-yard line. I think he sang the song from Free Willy.

Harrison Ford is stoned all the time? Dammit. I was already overly forgiving of his two divorces. Maybe I won't marry him afterall. Guess I should quit plotting against Calista.

Bullfrog - thanks for the superbowl play-by-play since I didn't get to watch it here (I could have, but would have required staying up too late, plus what's the point without the American commercials).

This is why I'm here, KT.

Incidentally, Sports Guy did a running commentary, too. I'm biased, but I think mine was better.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?pag e=simmons/060206

To his defense, since the Redskins had no chance of being in this game and because I'm not really that wrapped-up in the NFL these days, I didn't have to spend half my blog griping about the Patriots not being here. He defends Brady like he's his hot little sister or something. Although he makes one awesome joke about Seattle's Slow Down offense to end the first half and My Pet Goat. Like I always say, bash shitwit, and I'm happy.

RAW, thanks - forgot to look that up after I finished. That's not just the perfect football name, that's one of the all-time names ever.

MNP, I don't really know what I'm basing this on, but I've always assumed those people were contest-winners or something.

I know I link Deadspin with alarming regularity these days, but check out their latest find:

http://touchingallthebases.blogspot.com/2006/0 2/as-if-we-needed-another-reason-to-hate.html

'Licia, I'm sorry - I have no problem with your school as an academic institution, and I use the coffee mug you gave me on a regular basis. But, dag, it's like A-Rod is born with a disorder that, every day when he wakes up, makes him think, "What's a new way for me to just really, really suck today?"

Don't know if you listen to Booker on 92.3 at 7pm but his sports guy is a member of Red Sox Nation and recently gave the 'Now I feel like a Yankee' centerfielder his new name - Johnny 'Anakin' Damon.

Zero

Not familiar with him, no.. I like the Anakin moniker, though. Really looking forward to Johnny bombing with the Yankees. I bet he and Jeter have just *tons* to talk about.

Reggie is confused about what makes people tick...I would love it if someone in the world can explain to me why one would have such a problem with freedom of speech that he or she (in this case, the religion only apparently permits the "he's" to) go out and stampede a fellow protester against free-speech and stone and burn their his or her ("her's" excluded as explained above) own towns. Doesn't anyone work or play video games anymore? And, since when does anyone care (nor read) what is published in a Danish newspaper? My God (not Allah) people are sensitive.

Is this about the cartoons? I've been avoiding reading up on that. I also like that your persona of Reggie Ho now speaks in the third-person. I'd say he's turning into the Hulk, but Reggie Ho was about five four, so I guess we're talking about the Unfrozen Hawaiian Caveman Placekicker, here.

Small people like Reggie always speak about themselves in the 3rd person. That's how Reggie likes to be.

I worry more and more about you every time you write in, Reg.